I have to say that I am no longer the fan of the Housewives franchises that I once was. I watched them all – coast to coast. That being said, the typically mild month of May has seen a whole slew of Shade coming from the Atlanta cast. I’m mainly focusing on a particular portion of the cast: Phaedra and Apollo. Now despite anyone’s feelings on who’s your favorite or least-favorite housewife on the cast I’m pretty sure we can agree on one thing – watching someone’s life crack open isn’t all that easy to watch. I wanted to bring up this wobbly relationship mostly because of something that was said while discussing all of the crazy that happened at the RHOA reunion special. Basically I was discussing all the crazy with my sister when the conversation turned to Miss Phaedra and the drama that swirled around her, thanks in part to Miss Kenya (that girl is a master with the spoon – she sure can stir!) and her rather inappropriate interactions with Apollo. To sum up my sisters comments, they went something like this:
“I don’t get her [Phaedra]. She is always talking about being so classy and representing a true Southern Belle. I like her, but I don’t get her. She is so successful and she has done so much. She was a lawyer, and then she got her degree in mortician science… But she keeps herself attached to a guy like Apollo. It makes no sense. And you see it with other women all the time. A woman talks all about being strong and independent, then gets with a guy who is so disrespectful.”
I agree with her. And all of Apollo’s recent whining about his current legal troubles isn’t helping. “I think Phaedra… should be supportive as a wife should be.” Really, Apollo, how much mess do you have to step in before its okay for Phaedra to tell you to take off your shoes?
Moral of the story is this: Ladies, get it together! I’m not advocating throwing your man away because of a mistake. Even if he cheats, you might be able to salvage the relationship: I’ve seen it done, and it’s a choice only you can make. However, be clear about what you are willing to work past and through… and draw a clear line. The most basic line should always be: respect. Aretha didn’t sing about it for nothing! Your significant other can stray (or just screw up) in 100 different ways, and not all of them are deal-breakers. But when your partner starts trying to dictate your reactions to a situation, that’s when reevaluation needs to happen. Your feelings are your own and they are always valid – no matter what expectations or desires someone else may have. Regardless, you should hold yourself to that simple line. Only allow people in your life who deserve to be there… and don’t be afraid to show them the door when they’ve lost the right to room in your life.